Bangkok or up-country? Which is best?

So you're not sure whether to teach in Bangkok or out in rural Thailand? When you analyze both options under a dozen different headings, which one comes out on top?

Availability of teaching jobs

Go back several years and this wouldn't have even been a contest. As far as any TEFLer was concerned, the streets of Bangkok were paved with gold and the only reason you contemplated teaching up-country was if you had an allergy to pollution or you were brought up on a farm. But since stricter teacher regulations came into force, there's been something of a strange turnaround. Teachers, many of them well-qualified, are suddenly struggling to find teaching work in big bad Bangers and those that teach out in the rurals are saying "come on in - the water's lovely"

Verdict - we can't seperate them. Bangkok is just not the TEFL paradise it once was. A point apiece. Bangkok 1 Up-country 1.

Teacher salaries

An old teaching colleague got in touch with me from Australia. He left Thailand about seven years ago after putting in a ten-year stint as an academic director at several private language schools. He couldn't believe what he was reading on the ajarn jobs page. "Hi Phil. I haven't looked at ajarn.com for some time but salaries look like they haven't gone up since the day I left. Are teachers still actually working for 30,000 baht a month?" Well, yes Dave they are. Some for even less than that. However, let's not be too downbeat. There has been a slight increase in a teacher's pay over time but certainly not one that has kept pace with inflation. And I still think that salaries have risen more in Bangkok than they have out in the sticks.

Verdict - a victory for Bangkok, but only by a klong rat's whisker. Bangkok 2 Up-country 1.

Accommodation

It's always more expensive to live in a country's capital and Bangkok is no exception. The money you would pay for a Sukhumwit Road shoebox will get you a sweeping driveway, a maid's quarters, and at least four bathrooms once you move out to the rice fields. OK, that's an exaggeration but you only have to look through ajarn's cost of living section to see that deep in the Nakhon Nowheres, you get far more bricks and mortar for your rental buck.

Verdict - while Bangkok sits on a wall licking a plain orange ice-lolly, Up-country struts past with an ice cream double flake and raspberry sauce. Bangkok 2 Up-country 2. Get in there!

Entertainment

I don't believe we're even going here. Bangkok has its faults but when darkness falls, it's up there with the world's greatest entertainment cities. And I don't just mean the legendary naughty nightlife - the city is heaving with restaurants, cafes, bookshops, pubs, shopping malls and cinemas. The guarantee you'll almost never be bored while you've money to spend. For the upcountry chalkie - unless they are lucky enough to teach in a beach resort - entertainment boils down to pushing a trolley around the new Tesco Lotus on the outskirts of town or joining your teaching colleagues at Noi's bar - the only bar in town - that's of course if Noi can be arsed to open.

Verdict - Upcountry waves a small pathetic Thai flag while Bangkok glides past wearing a pink feather boa and sequinned mankini, on a chariot pulled my two muscular slaves. Bangkok 3 Up-country 2

Getting around / transportation

"It's fun living here but you need your own motorcycle" is something you often hear from chalkies who have put down roots in the Tambon Too Fars. But for those who have shunned the 'motorsai' in favor of living to see their thirtieth birthday, there's the constant headache of how to get around a provincial Thai town. Admittedly the pace of life in the rurals can be a little slower, a touch more genteel, but that doesn't mean I want to waste half the day on a bicycle rickshaw. You may decide on a local 'songthaew' or an overpriced tuk-tuk, you may even choose to walk, but whatever you decide, I'll give you a cheeky wave as I zip past on Bangkok's modern skytrain.

Verdict - It's another big point for Bangkok. Bangkok 4 Up-country 2 

Making Thai friends

No foreigner has a problem making friends in Thailand. And the more money you have, the easier it becomes. While up-country Thai folk will invite all and sundry to a restaurant and happily sit back and let the foreigner foot the bill, you might find the westernised Bangkok Thai is happy to go Dutch. Bangkok Thais refer to the practice of 'going Dutch' as 'American share'. It means 'you pay your share and I'll pay mine'. If your new Thai friend is not familiar with American share, then make sure they learn it fast. It could save you a fortune  When it comes to making Thai enemies, keep one thing in mind - only a big city allows you to slip into the shadows. Make an enemy out in the sticks and you'll imagine he's behind you every time you pop to 7-11 for a loaf.

Verdict - difficult to split the two. Bangkok Thai friends are generally cheaper than up-country Thai friends but oh go on then - you've twisted my arm - a point each. Bangkok 5 Up-country 3.

Keeping a low profile

In Bangkok, you're just another foreigner with a large nose and a tendency to blow your top over the smallest inconvenience. But in an up-country town, stop for a brief chat with a pretty female and it will be headlines in the afternoon edition of your wife's newspaper. In fact she doesn't have to be pretty; she just has to be female. In ajarn's region guide to Si Racha, Massive Geoff says that all the locals know him because he's often out and about with his Golden Retriever. Geoff probably doesn't need the Golden Retriever in order to get recognised. He just needs to be Geoff.

Verdict - whether or not you enjoy basking in the limelight as the local celebrity will depend on your character but more often than not, I want to walk the streets and be left alone. The point goes to Bangkok. Bangkok 6 Up-country 3.  

Earning money 'on the side'

We're talking about freelance teaching and corporate work here. Whether it's the chance to sit with some bored teenager in McDonalds for an hour because her father is convinced it's a great idea or the opportunity to clown around and entertain six of the sales staff at ABC Plastics, Bangkok has far more going for it. Bangkok Thais have got more money. Nuff said.  

Verdict - No contest. There might well be the opportunity to earn extra income at an up-country Rajabhat, but when it comes to sheer volume of freelance and corporate work, Bangkok's your man! Bangkok 7 Up-country 3  

Day trips and places to go

I'm always dubious of job ads that have 'close proximity to mountains and a nice waterfall' as part of their job description. I mean, it's not as if you're going to head off to the waterfall every afternoon, between classes. See it once and that'll probably be enough. But I know what the employer is getting at. And I'll concede that the lure of nature is a huge selling point in favor of working in the rurals. Twenty minutes is probably all it takes to find yourself surrounded by clean air and a verdant landscape. In Bangkok, it'll take you longer than that to negotiate your way on to the main road. And then it's a four or five-hour round trip to the nearest decent beach resort.

Verdict - Bangkok isn't even at the races. Bangkok 7 Up-country 4

Your students attitude

My wife said that I should include this section and come to think about it - why not indeed. What about the attitude of Thai students towards their teacher? Well, a quick read of Dave's Journey, our English teacher in North East Thailand, will give you some idea of just how respected a teacher can be in Thailand. Out in the boonies you truly are 'the ajarn'. You are the fountain of knowledge. You are the inspiration to young minds. You are an integral part of all their hopes and dreams. 

I once taught a corporate class in Bangkok, and the group included one female to whom I took an instant dislike. "You foreigners" she said "you only come and work as teachers because it's the only job you can get here" 

I'd like you to know that I stayed calm. I resisted the temptation to become embroiled in a heated argument or to slowly unscrew a chair leg and batter the f***ing idiot senseless - but it does highlight a point. Your Bangkok Thai can sometimes be too streetwise, too knowledgeable. Too lacking in finesse and subtlety. They can give it you straight between the eyes and it can certainly offend. So be prepared.

Verdict - Up-country steams in with another late point on account of probably having far nicer students. Bangkok 7 Up-country 5

General cost of living

Something else you often see in job ads. "The cost of living here is very cheap so you will save money"

It's important not to confuse this statement with "there is bugger all to spend your money on here - so you will save money" 

OK, accommodation is cheaper up-country I'll grant you. Transportation? no. Eating out? no. Trawling the pubs and bars? no. And you can't tell me that my carton of Tipco orange juice or my box of Nestle Cornflakes is going to cost me any less in Makro Phetburi than they are in Makro Bangkok.      

Verdict - a point each. I can't favor one over the other. Bangkok 8 Up-country 6