Afore Ye E-mail Me

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Hello there. Thanks for reading this because frankly it could save you a lot of time!
I simply can't and won't answer every e-mail that I receive. I get so many these days that sometimes I just can't cope. It's nothing personal, but if you read on you'll certainly work out your chances of getting a reply.
I don't want to create an environment where people feel they can't send me an email and ask a question or ask for a solution to a problem but I have a life outside this website (there has been some argument about that though) so if you are thinking of e-mailing me - then seriously - please read the following first.

Please put something in the subject line
As I tell all my e-mail writing students, in this age of spam filters and junk e-mail, you MUST put something in the e-mail subject line. It might be 'question for you' or 'can you help with a teaching question?' but please put something. If you leave the subject line blank, I'll ignore it because it'll probably end up in my spam filter anyway. Sorry but along with unpunctuality and people not paying back personal loans, it's my biggest pet hate.

Can I find you a job?
The answer is no, Sorry. I'm not a teacher recruiter nor am I involved with a school. When it comes to knowing what positions are available, I have the same information as you - the ajarn jobs page. Please don't waste your time sending me resumes (as dozens of people do) or emails asking if I know of any job opportunities. Spend your time wisely - scouring the jobs page.
Sometimes I get people sending me 3MB attachments with resumes, graduation photos and all sorts of shit. I can't tell you how mad that makes me. On a scale of 1 to 10 it scores about 57. I wouldn't mind if I had a job to offer in the first place.

Visa regulations
So many e-mails I get are asking me to basically second guess what an immigration officer or consulate official is going to say or what documentation they are going to ask for on any given day. Questions like these;

What documentation do I need to gain a non-immigrant B visa?
How long will it take to get a visa in Laos?
What's the best place in Asia to get a non-immigrant visa?
I've already had 500 tourist visas, will the consulate give me another one?

And dozens of others. The truth is I haven't got a clue. You are asking me to tell you what the official line is going to be at whatever embassy / consulate you choose to go to - and that's impossible. My recommendation is to either put your post on the ajarn discussion forum and find someone who has had a similar experience or better still, call the embassy / consulate that you plan to go to. There are also some good legal companies (with websites) or specialist forums like Thaivisa.com with the most up-to-date information. We also have a visa / work permit FAQ section on the website but it will only give you standard rulebook stuff that is available on dozens of websites. I can only give answers based on what I think will happen based on what I've read.

Will I find work in Thailand?
A lot of people e-mail me because they are worried they won't find work in Thailand because of perhaps age, color, nationality, lack of qualifications, etc, etc, etc. I personally believe there are jobs for anyone who wants one but in the current climate, those with degrees are going to find it much easier than those without. Those with a TEFL certificate and a degree are going to find it easier still. I think it's all common sense. Thailand loves its degree certificates - because in reality Thais can't get a job stacking supermarket shelves unless they have one. Will you find work here? I don't know. I've never met you. Please think about it seriously. You can't expect me to make life-changing decisions on someone I've never met. How good do you present yourself? Do you look professional? How is your knowledge of the English language as a subject. Only you know the answers.

I've got such and such a problem with a school
The school has terminated my contract. What can I do?
The school will fire me but I didn't do anything wrong?

Truthfully, I hate getting involved with these kind of situations and I'm cautious about giving any advice. I only have one side of the story and nine times out of ten I don't have the complete story. I have chased up these situations in the past and been left with some serious egg on my face. In any cases where I feel the teacher has been wronged by a school - my reply is always the same. Go to the Ministry of Labor. They are extremely helpful and they are very pro-employee. They will take care of your situation if your employer is truly (and I stress the word truly) in the wrong.

Could you recommend a TEFL course to me? 
This question is always met with a straight no. So many TEFL course providers are sponsors of the ajarn website that it would be totally unethical and inappropriate for me to favor one course over another. I also believe that you should never say favorable things about something you've never experienced. Seek out people who have taken the course before.

Will a school provide free dinners for my children and is there a place where woman can meet and discuss steam engines?
I get quite a lot of what I would call obscure questions. I read the e-mails. I read them again. And I wonder how I would be expected to know what time the Thai consulate in Brisbane opens without doing what the e-mail sender should be doing in the first place - googling it. Please Google it. It's only what I will be doing when you send me the question

I'm sorry if the comments above appear a little bit hard-nose, but I hate typing out one sentence replies when people have taken the trouble to e-mail me. However one sentence e-mails are probably better than nothing. I'll let you be the judge.